V Day ... 2022, what's hidden in it?

This day, also called as Valentine’s Day, famous for several reasons, mostly because it gives sellers a chance to sell, buyers – a reason to buy, and receivers a reason to be happy with the receipt. In all flavors, this day has become a bit famous in a sense everybody wants to talk about it.  

Although enough said, this does put one into thinking- ‘who’s thy Valentine?’. 

 

There’s always gotta be someone who gives you strength, fulfils your dream, makes you put a genuine effort through, is with you all the time when you need it – yeah – you guessed it, for me it was – ‘good old work’. People may let you down but the moment you start thinking work, everything, all issues fade away and it’s just that, that counts. 

This year was no different, just finished work, cooked some dinner, went to gym to complete a workout (nice to see many familiar faces still there) and then hit the sack. Did I do anything different last year? No? Would I do anything different next year? Don’t know. Am I bothered by it? Never, in-fact it’s a reason to be happy frankly.

 

‘Why happy though?’ – well, to understand this, one must understand the complexity of a relationship and what a relationship entails. It’s a bit odd, but every relationship starts on a very positive note, wherein usually there are some great synergies and vibes but over the period of time, many of them go down. The question is what changes? 

 

Maybe put it another way, every relationship has some work put into it, not just from one side but by both. Before that, let’s understand some basic facts. 

Actions speak louder than words. It’s simple – if you care, you will find time, maybe little time but you will. It’s not just for one person but both and it works only if both are doing it. You may give all the proofs and conversation to prove a point but the essential thing here is that mathematics never fails, human behavior can be easily tracked in terms of what is being actioned. Of course, you don’t need to love somebody to care for them but it’s never the other way around. Many go into the depth of causals what they expected and what they didn’t get but fail to ask the question to themselves, did they do enough? Were they doing it in a way which made the other person understand? Did the other person notice? It’s never big things or big promises, it’s never other things like intimacy in bedroom - all of this goes away with time, but the mental connection and the effort to work towards it, that’s what counts. This is true for other types of relationships also to some extent but especially important here. 

 

This reminds me of a real-life story I heard other day on npr wherein the girl shattered in an accident crushed by an 18 wheeler in coma, came back only because her partner made that effort. It might look one sided here but it’s not cos the girl in question came back from the dead when family had lost hope, is still on path to recovery, so effort is key, anywhere, but most of us don’t understand and fail to bother. This continues in the life span and one day things which are keeping each other going just are enough to go ahead together, it’s the little things – always. 

 

So before going into a relationship, and committing, the question which one should ask themselves is – did they give enough & did they get enough? Most of the relationships are either one sided or a compromise because we start failing to look at small things and start judging. But the fun part here is that each relationship triggers neurotransmitters which release stress hormones help one prepare for a breakup. So, whether one plans or not, the body prepares much earlier.  

 

Hence, conclusion here is that it always makes sense to not fall into a relationship but if you do, make sure it’s not just one sided but mutual, the little things matter and best case if this is not what it is then keeping away from it always helps the mind & body. 

 

Amazing Experiences – Part 1 - 2022 Begins...

New Year, new start & new resolutions – well, for me it was a bit different, because there were some old resolutions that had to be worked out yet. Btw – no offence to those who wind up early on all current & next year’s resolutions but sometimes you have got to evaluate & re-assess. It’s not a race but the way stuff is accomplished by understanding the various factors playing in. Some people push through easily, well, if a resolution is on a physical level, if you’ve got a good strong body, no dependencies & determination, you’ll always push through, the challenge really comes into play when you don’t have one or more of the above, you are with family who pushes you on other activities and then you have to ‘find time’. 

 

Well, for me, luckily, it wasn’t any of the above but more on re-accessing my performance with some combination of factors in play. I started my journey early morning to my gym with the goal of completing 45-50 laps of swim. This was purposely planned as covid restrictions had kept my swim levels to minimum for the whole last year. When I reached the gym pool, I was surprised to find few people in the pool. Usually it is a bit busy, so it was good for me (a +ve point). While I was approaching the swim lane, the lady said she was going to come out, which was another +ve point. While on her way out, she mentioned, water is a bit chilly, which I took casually because I had been to this pool a number of times and would have been able to comprehend the chill factor involved. Though, this changed very quickly as I got into the water.

 

It was cold, reminded me of the winter swim competition training, I pushed through and thought a couple of laps would warm up. 2 laps in – I was already feeling good, then on 3^rd lap, I noticed, I started losing breath half-way. My body was trying to balance the energy used to generate heat and provide for the motion forward. I knew, if I continued like this, I might collapse unconscious. While this was going on, 2 people came in for the swim and left after doing a round or two, not an encouragement factor though. So, the whole experience got me thinking now. 

 

I went to one side of the pool, and took a pause, starting to re-evaluate my goal criteria now, should I continue or call it quits and come back again? I had to reconsider. I knew – there was one factor which was concerning and 2 which were positive, so I started to shorten my goal criteria, initially – I set my goal to 10 laps max. At this point, I was probably not sure, whether I would be able to continue even 2 laps forward. Took a deep breath and swam to the end of the pool, the cold water wasn’t allowing me to keep my head under, so I strained to the point where I could just loose the breath but keep myself calm and then pushed through. Gladly, it worked. With a close to 6 feet deep-end, there was a choice of hanging on or continuing back. 

Well, for one thing, I wasn’t feeling that tired with this simple routine that I did and felt when the water was warm, so I continued. 

 

Few laps in and I look at the lap counter on my watch, it was 11 laps already. Now, I had to re-assess my goals again. Usually, my warms up focus on 20 laps cycle and then other ones come on the top of it. So, I decided, let’s not put a lot of risk in play and stick to 20 laps for now. Starting my lap count again, I continued with the swim, taking a short pause between 4 & 5 laps. To my surprise, I did see few more people come in and then leave the pool, but I wasn’t noticing enough as I was focusing on completing my warm-up lap journey.

 

Once, my warm-ups were done, I started feeling a bit more warmed up (as they say it) & energetic. Took a quick look around & could see 2 people on the treadmill, did notice the girl so was continuously running from sometime, at a fast pace. Well, some positive inspiration in place, I thought, let’s reduce the goal in half – maybe 25-30 laps. With that said, I had to factor in the mix, to cool myself down, so I gave another 5 laps and then did some backstrokes. Finally, this took me to 30 laps. Once, that was done, I was feeling good to go until 40, so I continued. 

 

On completion of 40 laps, I recollected that my swim journey didn’t have any butterfly stokes in the mix, so I started with them and tried to complete 45. Once one 45, I was feeling a bit more confident and put my goal to 60 laps max. That said, I continued, needless to say, water was not warming up, and I could feel the cold current brushing up again my body, causing my heart rate to rise but I tried to slow it down and then speed up, which kind of worked. While I was nearing 60, I noticed another lady come up in the pool and start swimming which kind of caught my attention as she was kind of not affected by the cold water. 

 

Well, that probably gave me some boost and I continued, but remembered, I had to clock it up so that I can continue with my next goal, so I continued until 71-72 and stopped there. Gladly, the lady too came out 2 laps before my finish, but the good thing was my goal of the day was completed.

 

So, the – take away here is – that we should always re-assess our goals and methods to accomplish them, taking risks which work out best and not overdoing it anytime. Ultimately, my goal was exceeded by 10 laps but then it was kind of a start target for next one so one must always keep that expectations matter.

 

The Gift - 2021

It’s time for holidays again & as we tread our way to close 2021, we all are anxious to welcome ‘that day’ when we all get to open our gifts!

 

The term gift puts up a smile on someone’s face & that smile is what chimes in with everyone who receives it, which becomes the common factor for the spread of joy! 

 

(A tradition which was started in old times for a reason – to give back, to achieve a sense of cheer for those who were unfortunate as well as those who were fortunate)

 

Although, with time the meaning of the gift has materialized differently, history has shaped itself to keep those high moments in and leave the troughs out.  The mere difference is that the troughs get forgotten over a period of time and one must always remember that though seemingly insignificant, troughs are the ones equally keeping the balance in for the wave to go through and reach many. 

 

So, the question that comes to the mind every time – a gift – is received is:

 

A)    What did I do to deserve one? Did I do enough?

B)    Will it make a difference to my life over a longer period of time?

C)    Does it serve a bigger purpose? How, will it effect, the lives of those unfortunate, who have never gotten a chance to get one?

 

Well, the fact of the matter is – except B) the other questions really don’t strike that much & many a times, the joy of receiving far exceeds the light which blinds the other questions. 

But more added to it, is the fact that the questions revolve around set expectations & fulfillment & the expectation rises every time. 

 

The people on the receiving end might get happy or not based on the expectation rather than the fact that did they do enough. There is always a competition to get more of it, that never seems to end. 

 

The human instinct of feeling great and getting loved by the quanta and not essentially a deserving quality has been growing rapidly. 

 

At a time like this, when the world has lost close to 800 million to something which was invisible & unfortunate, the question again comes back to understanding the troughs better. To make sure, we are not building domes in the sky which will ultimately crash with the swipe of a light wind. 

 

And it all again goes back to understanding the difference between something which can be - ‘a gift’ - but when used without the deep thought and just appeal, provoking a feel-good factor for an instant but little positive use long term, can quickly turn into something which doesn’t look like a gift at all. Not that this applies to excessive unnecessary notifications, social media, electronics with appeal but no usage or a piece of code which just serves some purpose but doesn’t fit into the long-term ever-changing picture. We probably might not be doing the absolute right thing if we are just blaming the producer of technology, when the consumption is driven by us, so a little thought goes much farther. And this applies to anything which we are trying to change from climate change, to making earth a better place to live to preserving it from unknown foreign factors in deep space.  

 

It’s just a small effort of thought – though might go a long way – provided the 3 questions might get more justice! 

 

Merry Christmas & Happy Holidays to all!

 

(Not that I have many (jokes apart) - but might I know the gifts that I have – earth being one)

(PS: The views & thoughts expressed in the blog above are my own and don't represent the views of any firm or organisation)

 

The 'joker'- a unique portrayel of the current world as it is ..

The joker - a unique portrayel of the current world as it is.

The best way to slay a person (ain't the sword) it is to make them feel worthless, without a cause, or a reason to live.

In today's world human skills of judgement and action are changing. The nature of human evolution has always been to work as a group, that randomness which comes together to function as a whole gives meaning and purpose.

The current world, which includes technology and practices give a human - the capability to isolate and isolation in whatever form, starts to serve as the main cause for the imbalance that springs within that individual. This imbalance starts to set up a wall, which grows between the person's continued ability to stand facing the world, telling all 'everything is good', and eliminating the negatives that might need to be re-examined as a group.

The imbalance slowly results in sprawls of actions, mind is the biggest juggernaut, but the moment it starts to loose purpose it will try to establish the purpose, either way.

You can see - it might be true that most of the people themselves are swirving on the edges of striking a balance or loosing it all.

The current world of medicine given to calm the person doesn't help, it just makes the situation worse, the imbalance grows and slowly it engulfs the person or a group of persons.

It is not taught but practised though it seems the best strategy to bring down a person at work is to stop noticing them, start to deplay anything that they do, & slowly make them loose their purpose.

Once their purpose is lost, their enthusiasm will go away, the person will just work to keep it going, some can live that way forever, others try to find another purpose.

Some are still able to keep this imbalance in control, in a sense maybe keeping or loosing their purpose completely.

Humans and only humans themselves use this strategy, at various points in the stages of life of themselves or others that they connect with, slowly creating a mechanism or machine to kill.

Such a person who is slain, is not just one person but a thought affecting masses, it catches not one but many so it is bigger than just executing someone, probably a bigger crime but often unnoticed.

There a many who are depressed today, many who are living in a group but lonely, who have probably lost a purpose. These are the jokers in the making which are very difficult to spot.

To the mind - comes the question - what is the solution? - well, the first step is to start working by noticing the ones we come in contact with, trying to make people feel they have a purpose, make them realize their importance, not just words will do but they can be the first step which will go a long way to make the system better. 

The world is but a set of algorithms designed to keep you engaged & spending...

Lately have been doing a lot of thinking and I don't really understand where to place this write-up in, whether it should be technical or something which eludicates to a general appeal so I am putting this in both channels.

Human level of intelligence is basically understood in terms of how the average person relates to his environment and reacts to his surroundings.

Many companies these days use data to harvest a pattern of behaviour from the human reaction - let's take an example -

The web is everyone's playground but silently behind the scenes there is someone watching how we are playing - you can translate it to our buying patterns, social interaction behaviour, reaction on non social but emotional or logical term, it's there - every time we click a 'like' button or react to a post there is a pattern positivity added to our profile, which might make us think we are writing our own stories with the endings that we want. Well, part of it is true but a part of it ain't very true or might be scary as well for people who consider rapid progress essential for human growth.

How? - well each time we click or react on the web we answer to an algorithm designed on a specific set of parameters - having a clear set of outcomes on the behavioural scale, the more truly we react, the more clearly our behaviour gets captured. Wherever there is a low probability & confusion on the established behaviour a superimposition to react to a different set of situations leading to a definite behaviour is triggered, in turn deciding very accurately what we like dislike and probably might like.

Now you might be thinking - well, how can this map be beneficial but before that - let's examine an algorithm that mankind has put in place unknowingly.

Let's consider the dating game - ever wondered if the sequence of events & the essential holidays of any country throughout the year, there is one thing common in all the holidays - a perception is geared to get you favourable conditions for finding your partner and settling down, it starts with the new year bash common for all, then comes valentines' day, summer - best time to experiment, goes into halloween and thanksgiving to get introduced to others in the family to Christmas, may be a time to settle down. It is seen each region of the world has holiday's which might be having similar cultural impact, so it all transforms into an algorithm, put in the right variables at the right time and you get the intended result.

Now let's come back to patterns which we were looking towards deciding a person's behaviour, at the end of the day - it's all business, the difference is how can we get anyone to buy a ten dollar ring at thousand dollars? if someone can know your behavioural reaction towards a product, they can gauge the pattern you prefer and in turn put the price, the challenge here is being satisfied with the pattern that we opt for - now that's where intelligence comes into picture. AI captures the results from your behaviour and puts in a different model so when someone is selling you shoes one day and clothes another day - they can know what kind of clothes you might want to go for. This is not the usual you bought something so you would get another one of the same sort - no - this is not capturing your product response but is essentially going into the root of your perception which decides your taste.

Now's what's the disadvantage here which currently most of the firms might not or might be ignoring, it's called the 'alice in wonderland paradox' - if alice is in wonderland all the time, she might start getting bored of the concept of wonderland, that's critical for anyone to understand - as that is criteria where now the balance of what you would have liked and what you might like has been lost, in other words - the common man just entered the confusional decision state, either that or they are enjoying the wonderland that is created, unless and until - the person has got reasoning to question the wonderland itself thus causing the creators to make a better wonderland.

The battle goes on and will go on... probably we will get better much better products but as decision makers and approvers, we always have a far greater capability to decision right now to create a better choice...

Susti se saaja hua khana..beman samagriyon ka samagam!

Sust chicken mein

Beman tamatar aur sota hua pyaaz daala

Jhulse hue jeere aur tadapti raai se usse bagara

Daahi ki bikhartee hue see daasha sambhli sambhali kadhai mein daali

Phir kaali mirch kee gussail aankhen bhi usme duba leen

Namak to kaabse injezaar mein tha kee koi usse mila de baaki susto se

Woh bhi rasam poori ke aur tamtamayi mirch kee bagar daali

Tab jaake hua rang gehra pyaaz aur tamatar ka aaj aur ek saundhee see mahak jaagi khaas

Par itna kaafi na tha suston ko sustee se uthane ka prayas 

To humne phir lagaya apni kalakari ka poora abhyas aur mila diya kasoori methi rupak paani ke jhaunke ka ek chotta sa sath

Suston ko hua tab subah hone ka gyaat aur murge ke salan mein aaya swaad ke jagne ki khusbhoo ka ek anokha ehsaas..

To doston is tarah baani woh ‘chicken curry khasam khaas’!

The importance of communication & sharing...

The universe & be-it so the earth as well was formed with one idea which helps survival and another which  helps perfection - in between the two is 'balance'... 'earth' was formed with 'balance' in picture!

Now what the heck do I mean by this?

Let's understand via an example of astronomy and human species formation and then break it down into our daily activities which help us multiply and generate new life.

So earth along with other planets has been constantly revolving around the sun .. when this happens there is energy generated, the wavelengths which are emitted each of these wavelength are different which cause the resultant signal to be percieved as if they were similar negative wavelength should have countered the positive one.

Let's take another example here, a case where we have species trying to multiply, it takes two different persons to create a third person who would have characteristics which is a combination of the two, so that's the cycle of life but the way that is different from the clone is because of the fact that this new individual is more resistant and adaptable to their surroundings than their parents, hence it leads its way into survival, a clone wouldn't have gone too far here.

Let's take another example of perfection which might lead to destruction, talk about security - imagine you've got a perfect locker which cannot be broken and that locker is being used to house your money and all your secrets. No one knows the code to that locker and only you are aware of it. You are perfectly safe - what are the odds, then? If by any means there is mechanism to break your code on that locker, you are exposed! Now, did you see that coming?

That's exactly what happens to humans, when it comes to personal details everyone establishes that wall of security in front of them, thinking they are clever and nobody will be able to access their feelings. Some stop communicating, some retract communication, some restrict communication and eventually establish a barrier thinking this a mechanism for productivity.

Well, they just defied the law of survival, what would happen next, perfection would one day cease them... if they had just established that communication more, talked to other people about their feelings and would have got perspectives, if they had tried to keep their some secrets hidden but maintain a way to exchange ideas, if they had thought about the balance - they would have continued to grow in strength and confidence and would have ultimately survived!

This is the basis, I see this a lot these days - especially those from a management perspective always start with the thinking everything can be broken down into methods and perfection and can be achieved, the basic question is - there is no perfection if there is continuity... that's what makes everyone carry on!!